Tuesday, August 12, 2008

And we all fall down

It was a perfect summer's evening. The sun had just set, and stars were beginning to pop out of the deepening blue sky overhead. And then the fun started. There was screaming. Children were traumatized. Neighbors came running. No big deal, really. It's just a day in the life at the bishop's house.

The knee that has been the bane of my spring and summer has been improving dramatically in recent days and I have been working hard on getting my full range of motion back and re-training myself to walk without a limp. Last week my physical therapist, Ed (aka The Dungeon Master) was so happy with my progress that he said I only needed to come in once a week. I even did a tiny bit of clogging - yes, dad, I was careful! - to help Nathan and Megan practice for summer lessons. I am jazzed about getting my mobility back, and with it, my life.

Life is good.

Oh, except for one little detail.

Last night I fell out the front door and hurt myself. Again.

It was one of those stupid things that you keep going over in your mind and see all the ways it could have been avoided. If only I'd taken my stupid waffle stomper shoes off earlier so that my toe didn't catch on the threshold. Or maybe if I'd picked my feet up or -- oh here's a good one -- watched where I was going instead of scanning the horizon for a stupid planet we'd been watching for all summer. If only I'd declined my husband's offer to come and see Venus in the sunset instead of brushing my teeth. I had the toothpaste on my brush. I already had two buttons undone on my shirt. It all happened so fast. One moment I was stepping out the front door to see the sunset and the next I was on the porch, kneeling a step down on the welcome mat with my feet pinned behind me on the threshold above, my still tender knee bent as far as it would go-- far more than it had been bent in the last five months since I first hurt it.

I made quite a spectacle of myself. Tom was standing right behind me when it happened, and although it seemed like forever, within seconds he had lifted me off the porch and drug me backwards into the house so that I sat clutching my knee with both hands, my feet dangling out the door down onto the wide top step. I don't remember why the screen door didn't close on me. Was he holding it open or was I? I could hear Megan wailing in the kitchen. A door slammed somewhere in the house. The floor was shifting and the walls began to spin slowly. Someone was groaning loudly. It made me mad. SHUT UP, already! Oh wait... that would be me. Quick, somebody get a sock and stuff it in my mouth to stop that pitiful mewling noise!

Just then the neighbors arrived. Are you ok?! Oh... hi! Uhhhhh - yes I'm fine, but could you do me a really big favor and maybe get a gun and just shoot me? Right now would be real, real good.

One burly guy helped Tom hoist my great bulk the rest of the way into the house and onto the couch. Karianne, ever the calm one, filled ice packs and brought them to pack around me leg. I think maybe she should go into nursing or something. That girl has nerves of steel. Tom went to comfort the sobbing Megan and checked on Susan, who had fled to her room in tears.

So now I'm on the couch propped up on pillows and my knee is blessedly numb from the ice. I am telling the kids that I will be okay and I that I don't think I did any more damage. I'm telling them that I'll be back up and around again in no time.

But there's one burning question in my mind that I don't have an answer for...

Did I ever button my shirt back up?


  1. I can not resist the urge to tell you how important it is not to go watch the sunset with a boy when you have been unbuttoning your shirt! It is bad carma all over the place. Seriously, I am dying to talk to you. I don't know the word for more than hope....I am just begging the heavens that your knee is not injured more. I am so sorry. Call me when you are up...or rather awake.

  2. Hopefully that knee will just be a little irritated for a little while and then be done.

  3. Dang it! You need to get some training wheels, girl. I'm sorry Humpty Dumpty had a fall, but I hope that the king's men don't have to put you back together. Hopefully, you'll just bounce right back.


  4. all i can say is OMG! you better be okay. i hope that this morning life is great and the knee is a little tender but no harm done. we need another post to update...or a phone call. my fingers are crossed!

  5. Ok... I am anxiously waiting to hear how your knee is feeling today too. We are all praying that it is ok and that if your shirt was left open, no one looked. :) Update us, please!!!

  6. I am so sorry. That sounds seriously horrible. Jared started PT yesterday and he is in so much pain today, he hasn't been out of bed, except for a doctor appointment today. Best of wishes that it turns out OK.

  7. Oh, Lisa, I am so sorry, I am praying that everything is just sore today.

    If not, then you have to ask yourself what you are supposed to have learned from all this knee fun and then learn it quick, like graciously accepting help, or empathy for others, or turning to the Lord in your darkest hrs or...

    Also, stay on the couch until all tripping hazzard have been removed from your house!!

  8. Sorry to leave y'all in suspense all day...

    Okay, so to answer the first and most pressing question: Yes, Tom assured me that I did button up my shirt. As the self appointed protector of my modesty (i.e. - he doesn't want anyone else gawking) he would never allow me to head out the front door with white showing. Whew.

    Secondly, it seems that my knee is just swollen and stiff, but it seems to be working okay. I iced it all night and through the morning, and then spent some time walking on it today, and I found that the more I walked the less I limped. So although it is swollen and ugly-ish, I am thrilled to say that I think in a week or so I'll be back to my bad self again. Here's hoping.

    Yes, Kris, I agree that I need to hurry up and learn something so this can be over! Hm. Empathy/compassion I think I at least have a clue about... the accepting help graciously and turning to the Lord stuff is harder for me. But them's a whole 'nother pair of blog posts!

  9. Hi, Lisa. I didn't turn on the computer until just now. I agonized thru your blog and the comments, and was glad to read your last post, only minutes ago. If I had read this earlier in the day, I would have really worried.

    Have your little ones returned to normal? Megan has such a tender heart.

    So you have been watching Venus at the sunset, and I have been watching Jupiter at 9 pm in the south-east. It reminds me of our Coock-oos nest!

    Love you.

  10. I'm so glad that you are ok. Maybe you have learned your lessons after all.

  11. Hey, Lisa, I remembered that on your profile you mentioned you're a big Orson Scott Card fan. While your knee is recovering, read Invasive Procedures, cuz it's pretty good! I'm glad you're not hurt any more than you are!

  12. Sorry dad, to make you worry. I struggle with blogging stuff that happens to me and things I'm thinking because I know you do that. Should I stop?

    Becky - I read that book earlier this summer. Wow - that was one disturbing story! Kinda puts my defective knee in perspective huh?

  13. Don't stop!!!! It's ok to tell about your life. If you're able to write, then you are still alive. And it's my job to worry about you. You are all I have left.

    By the wat, Karianne!! You are my girl. How's Susan? And Megan? What about Nathan?

    Anyway, live is full of surprises!