I'm having trouble coming up with funny stuff of my own to say lately, so let me direct you to a post that made me smile. Widely.
Someday I'm going Supernova
Monday, October 13, 2008
Friday, October 10, 2008
Blog Review: The Crash Test Dummy Diaries
I may regret this day's work. Yes, I think I definitely will regret this. Why, you ask? Because I am going to tell you about one of my very most favorite blogs. It's one of those best-kept-secret kind of blogs -- still small yet but destined for greatness. I'm going to regret this because once you visit this blog you will be spoiled forever and may never come back to the Funny Farm.
The Crash Test Dummy Diaries (CTDD) is clever in a lure-you-in-with-humor-and-then-pierce-you-to-the-heart kind of way. Take this post for example. Drop Dead Funny. Here's another one of my favorites. Her observations on spousal snoring are spot on. The one about the bed made me chuckle. The Crash Test Dummy tells the truth about family bliss and her religion with a satirical twist that will have you laughing at the same time you're shaking your head in frustration because dang she is so right.
And then, when you're least expecting it, she'll pull a fast one on you. Every now and then she gets deep, and every time that happens I find myself in over my head wondering where the bottom of the lagoon went! One of the things I appreciate most about this blog isn't the humor, although there's plenty of that. No, the thing that makes The CTDD a great blog is the pain behind the laughter. All the best writers have that in common. The Crash Test Dummy is no exception.
Go. Read. Laugh. Cry. And if you ever get tired of really great writing, I'll still be here.
But you know what? That's fine. I'm not blogging for fame and fortune anyway. Actually I'm kinda over blogging this week. So if all my followers forsake me for this great new blog, I'll be mostly okay with that. Totally Oh-Kay. In FACT, I am so okay with it I'll even open the door for you! And don't let it smack your cute little behinds on the way out!!
Ahem.
Ahem.
The Crash Test Dummy Diaries (CTDD) is clever in a lure-you-in-with-humor-and-then-pierce-you-to-the-heart kind of way. Take this post for example. Drop Dead Funny. Here's another one of my favorites. Her observations on spousal snoring are spot on. The one about the bed made me chuckle. The Crash Test Dummy tells the truth about family bliss and her religion with a satirical twist that will have you laughing at the same time you're shaking your head in frustration because dang she is so right.
And then, when you're least expecting it, she'll pull a fast one on you. Every now and then she gets deep, and every time that happens I find myself in over my head wondering where the bottom of the lagoon went! One of the things I appreciate most about this blog isn't the humor, although there's plenty of that. No, the thing that makes The CTDD a great blog is the pain behind the laughter. All the best writers have that in common. The Crash Test Dummy is no exception.
Go. Read. Laugh. Cry. And if you ever get tired of really great writing, I'll still be here.
Wednesday, October 8, 2008
Dutch Babies
Remember when I was all sad and rejected because my husband wouldn't eat Dutch Babies? Well, y'all are in luck because my good friend theThe Amazing Cook has posted the recipe with pictures.
While you're there, check out her hilarious post about all the stoopid questions people ask you when you're trying to get pregnant.
Like I said, this girl can cook. She's posted several recipes and they are dang good, like Maple Oat Bread, Leek Soup, Clam Chowder, and the most rich and fattening Pumpkin Cobbler. She also makes a wicked tuna salad and yummy Philly Cheesesteak Sandwiches... I gotta get her to blog about those! Hint hint!
While you're there, check out her hilarious post about all the stoopid questions people ask you when you're trying to get pregnant.
Like I said, this girl can cook. She's posted several recipes and they are dang good, like Maple Oat Bread, Leek Soup, Clam Chowder, and the most rich and fattening Pumpkin Cobbler. She also makes a wicked tuna salad and yummy Philly Cheesesteak Sandwiches... I gotta get her to blog about those! Hint hint!
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
Conference Thoughts
Last weekend was my church's semi-annual General Conference. General Conference was a hugely uplifting and motivating event for me this year. I'd like to spend a few posts sharing and discussing my feelings about some of the talks that were given during this marvelous weekend.
For those not familiar with the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, General Conference is held on the first weekend of April and October each year. There are five 2-hour sessions: Saturday Morning, Saturday Afternoon, Saturday Evening Priesthood Session (for men and boys age 12 and up), Sunday Morning, and Sunday Afternoon. On the last Saturday of September is the General Relief Society Meeting for women, and the last Saturday of March is the Young Women General Meeting for girls age 12 and up and their mothers and leaders.
Each session is filled with music and inspirational talks chosen from among the Church's general authorities. For members of the church, it is a time to listen to our living prophets and hear God's specific instructions through them.
General Conference (GC for short - since I'm lazy) is like a buffet for me; I tend to pick and choose from the talks that are most interesting and personally relevant. Over the years I have come to realize that what I get out of GC is directly related to my spiritual preparation for it. If I am praying and studying the scriptures, I have a much more fulfilling and positive experience with GC than if I am just coasting along, neglecting those very most basic principles that invite tutoring by the Holy Ghost.
Last April, GC was kind of a been-there-done-that event. I wasn't reading scriptures or praying regularly (more on that later), and therefore wasn't really prepared for the feast that was available to me. All the talks sounded much the same; just more humdrum "do better" and "beware the world" ... frankly I don't remember much. I watched because A) we always watch/listen, and B) it was the first GC since President Hinckley had died and we had a new President to sustain. I remember feeling neutral about President Monson, nothing particularly critical, but nothing amazing either. I had long since gained a testimony of the succession of prophets, and it didn't particularly bother me that I didn't have a huge Witness that Thomas S. Monson was now the Lord's Prophet, Seer, and Revelator for the entire church. It was no surprise, therefore why would I need a witness?
I remember being somewhat interested in some of the talks, bored by most, and downright annoyed by others. I didn't make a great effort to concentrate on all of the sessions. The weekend came and went. I told myself that I would study the talks more carefully in the weeks ahead. I even downloaded mp3 files of all the talks to my computer and mp3 player. And I never listened or read a single one.
This Conference was entirely different. A few weeks ago I began, with the encouragement of a good friend, another attempt to read scriptures everyday and pray at least once per day. It's been making a difference in me. But I didn't realize how much of a difference until GC weekend. Whereas past conferences I've picked a little from the buffet of talks, here a little and there a little, tasting with skepticism and often disappointment, this time I felt like I was gorging on a succulent feast. Nearly every talk had something in it that was delicious to me. My heart felt full to bursting with renewed hope and optimism. It came too fast and furious to take it all in, and I felt an enthusiastic motivation to study the counsel until I could make it part of me.
FYI - the church website has a media player on which you can watch all sessions of GC -- with the exception of the SECRET priesthood session, which has always been odd to me, since it eventually gets published in the Ensign anyway -- and I highly recommend this. It includes all the prayers and music, and you can also skip to the specific talks you'd like to watch. Mp3 audio files are available now at this link, and soon will be followed by written transcripts if you prefer that method of study.
My plan is to share a few thoughts about some of the talks I found most helpful and inspiring. I would love it if you would like to join in and discuss them with me.
For those not familiar with the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, General Conference is held on the first weekend of April and October each year. There are five 2-hour sessions: Saturday Morning, Saturday Afternoon, Saturday Evening Priesthood Session (for men and boys age 12 and up), Sunday Morning, and Sunday Afternoon. On the last Saturday of September is the General Relief Society Meeting for women, and the last Saturday of March is the Young Women General Meeting for girls age 12 and up and their mothers and leaders.
Each session is filled with music and inspirational talks chosen from among the Church's general authorities. For members of the church, it is a time to listen to our living prophets and hear God's specific instructions through them.
General Conference (GC for short - since I'm lazy) is like a buffet for me; I tend to pick and choose from the talks that are most interesting and personally relevant. Over the years I have come to realize that what I get out of GC is directly related to my spiritual preparation for it. If I am praying and studying the scriptures, I have a much more fulfilling and positive experience with GC than if I am just coasting along, neglecting those very most basic principles that invite tutoring by the Holy Ghost.
Last April, GC was kind of a been-there-done-that event. I wasn't reading scriptures or praying regularly (more on that later), and therefore wasn't really prepared for the feast that was available to me. All the talks sounded much the same; just more humdrum "do better" and "beware the world" ... frankly I don't remember much. I watched because A) we always watch/listen, and B) it was the first GC since President Hinckley had died and we had a new President to sustain. I remember feeling neutral about President Monson, nothing particularly critical, but nothing amazing either. I had long since gained a testimony of the succession of prophets, and it didn't particularly bother me that I didn't have a huge Witness that Thomas S. Monson was now the Lord's Prophet, Seer, and Revelator for the entire church. It was no surprise, therefore why would I need a witness?
I remember being somewhat interested in some of the talks, bored by most, and downright annoyed by others. I didn't make a great effort to concentrate on all of the sessions. The weekend came and went. I told myself that I would study the talks more carefully in the weeks ahead. I even downloaded mp3 files of all the talks to my computer and mp3 player. And I never listened or read a single one.
This Conference was entirely different. A few weeks ago I began, with the encouragement of a good friend, another attempt to read scriptures everyday and pray at least once per day. It's been making a difference in me. But I didn't realize how much of a difference until GC weekend. Whereas past conferences I've picked a little from the buffet of talks, here a little and there a little, tasting with skepticism and often disappointment, this time I felt like I was gorging on a succulent feast. Nearly every talk had something in it that was delicious to me. My heart felt full to bursting with renewed hope and optimism. It came too fast and furious to take it all in, and I felt an enthusiastic motivation to study the counsel until I could make it part of me.
FYI - the church website has a media player on which you can watch all sessions of GC -- with the exception of the SECRET priesthood session, which has always been odd to me, since it eventually gets published in the Ensign anyway -- and I highly recommend this. It includes all the prayers and music, and you can also skip to the specific talks you'd like to watch. Mp3 audio files are available now at this link, and soon will be followed by written transcripts if you prefer that method of study.
My plan is to share a few thoughts about some of the talks I found most helpful and inspiring. I would love it if you would like to join in and discuss them with me.
Saturday, October 4, 2008
So there was this cute guy...
at the gym yesterday. I first caught sight of him as I walked to the fountain to fill my water bottle. He was pumping iron with an obscene amount of weight on the bar. His face was focused and tense with effort, triceps in sharp relief on the backs of his arms as the bar was pushed up, then let down to touch his broad chest, then back up again. Down. Up. Down. Up...
Someone cleared his throat behind me, and I jumped. Oh, sorry! Uh... go ahead, yeah I'm through. I stepped away from the fountain, my water bottle only half full. I forced myself to turn away from the hunk on the bench press and walked purposefully to the other side of the room.
I put my earbuds in, turned up the volume, and started into my workout: Arms, back, abs, legs. I finished the leg press and was headed to the leg curl, and there he was perched on the calf machine right next to the leg curl machine. Dude--this guy was hot! He wore his dark hair cropped short, and his eyes twinkled mischievously when he smiled at me as I approached. I grinned back uncertainly. Blushing, I spun away and walked in the opposite direction toward the stationary bikes. Forget the leg curls--I am so not doing those with him watching!
I picked the first bike in the row and started pedaling. I fought temptation for a minute, lost, and looked across to the calf machine. He was gone. I casually scanned the room until I found him just finishing squats over by the windows. Then he moved over to the pull-up bar, right in plain view from my position. His shirt stretched tight over his back muscles and his biceps bulged as his body moved smoothly up and down. He made it look sooooo easy. He dropped to the floor, wiped the sweat from his brow with a towel, and headed right toward me. He grinned and winked at me as he passed. What the heck? Is this guy flirting with me?! I am a happily married woman, for heaven's sake! I should leave right now, that's what I should do! What if a member of my ward witnesses this? What do I do if he actually talks to me?!
But I didn't leave. I didn't really want to.
He continued behind me and got on a treadmill one row back. I risked a glance over my shoulder and was relieved to see that his eyes were riveted on the bank of televisions suspended from the ceiling. He was probably watching Sportscenter or that sleazy music video on screen #5. I pedaled with an adrenaline assist until my 20 minutes were up, then began to gather my stuff and prepared to dash for the door. Before I could bolt, I heard footsteps and then a voice right behind me.
"Hi."
I turned slowly and grinned crookedly up at those smiling eyes while winding my earbud chord around my mp3 player. "Hi, handsome. Have a good workout?"
"Yeah. You?"
"Yeah. I was a little distracted though. Did you have to show off with the pull-ups? You know I can't concentrate when you do pull-ups."
His grin widened wickedly. "Yeah. I know you can't."
I punched him lightly on the shoulder. "Come on. The kids will be wondering what's for dinner."
"What is for dinner, anyway?"
"Dutch Babies," I smirked.
He winced in mock disgust. "Would you be offended if I picked up some pizza?"
I stared at him... dumbfounded. Then I found my voice.
"Get me a Supreme, will you?"
Someone cleared his throat behind me, and I jumped. Oh, sorry! Uh... go ahead, yeah I'm through. I stepped away from the fountain, my water bottle only half full. I forced myself to turn away from the hunk on the bench press and walked purposefully to the other side of the room.
I put my earbuds in, turned up the volume, and started into my workout: Arms, back, abs, legs. I finished the leg press and was headed to the leg curl, and there he was perched on the calf machine right next to the leg curl machine. Dude--this guy was hot! He wore his dark hair cropped short, and his eyes twinkled mischievously when he smiled at me as I approached. I grinned back uncertainly. Blushing, I spun away and walked in the opposite direction toward the stationary bikes. Forget the leg curls--I am so not doing those with him watching!
I picked the first bike in the row and started pedaling. I fought temptation for a minute, lost, and looked across to the calf machine. He was gone. I casually scanned the room until I found him just finishing squats over by the windows. Then he moved over to the pull-up bar, right in plain view from my position. His shirt stretched tight over his back muscles and his biceps bulged as his body moved smoothly up and down. He made it look sooooo easy. He dropped to the floor, wiped the sweat from his brow with a towel, and headed right toward me. He grinned and winked at me as he passed. What the heck? Is this guy flirting with me?! I am a happily married woman, for heaven's sake! I should leave right now, that's what I should do! What if a member of my ward witnesses this? What do I do if he actually talks to me?!
But I didn't leave. I didn't really want to.
He continued behind me and got on a treadmill one row back. I risked a glance over my shoulder and was relieved to see that his eyes were riveted on the bank of televisions suspended from the ceiling. He was probably watching Sportscenter or that sleazy music video on screen #5. I pedaled with an adrenaline assist until my 20 minutes were up, then began to gather my stuff and prepared to dash for the door. Before I could bolt, I heard footsteps and then a voice right behind me.
"Hi."
I turned slowly and grinned crookedly up at those smiling eyes while winding my earbud chord around my mp3 player. "Hi, handsome. Have a good workout?"
"Yeah. You?"
"Yeah. I was a little distracted though. Did you have to show off with the pull-ups? You know I can't concentrate when you do pull-ups."
His grin widened wickedly. "Yeah. I know you can't."
I punched him lightly on the shoulder. "Come on. The kids will be wondering what's for dinner."
"What is for dinner, anyway?"
"Dutch Babies," I smirked.
He winced in mock disgust. "Would you be offended if I picked up some pizza?"
I stared at him... dumbfounded. Then I found my voice.
"Get me a Supreme, will you?"
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